So, it seems that although I am having unprecedented success at maintaining my exercise schedule and eating regimen, I seem, of late, to have trouble staying on target for my blog posts. We got back from our trip to Ann Arbor, MI late last Thursday night, and then the weekend and subsequent week got away from me. To all my faithful readers out there, I sincerely apologize for the tardiness of this post and hope to stay on track with posting Sunday nights/Monday mornings from this point on.
So, without any further ado, here are last weeks stats:
Weight Sunday 3/31 276.9
Weight Sunday 4/7 276.1
Total weight loss to date: 12.6 pounds in 4 weeks
Tues 4/2 run/walk 3 mi. 00:46:00
Thur. 4/4 run/walk 3.03 mi. 00:49:58 -legs were like lead, had to stop several times to stretch
Sat. 4/6 walk 4.65 mi. 01:19:18 walked with Beck. Had to work to keep up with her pace.
Sun. 4/7 run/walk 3.1 mi. 00:45:05 -started doing alternating intervals of 4 min run and 6 min run separated by 3 min walks. Going well. (Actually shaved 00:01:14 off my 5K time today, Wednesday)
I know the weight loss was not as big as prior weeks, but I still have to remind myself that we went away on a trip and I managed to lose. My eating was not terrible by any means, but there was more sodium, some caffine, some processed things. However in the past on a trip, and especially visiting my family, I would have been up 5 lbs. The fact that I was able to come home down at all was a small gain, big victory.
Also the fact that I got up early on vacation twice to go out and run was a huge accomplishment for me. A trip would have been the perfect excuse to say "oh, I can skip it today, I'm on vacation ..." But you know what, that's a bullshit excuse, and one that I have use many times before. But as I am learning, this journey is, among other things, a journey of NO MORE EXCUSES. "It's Easter, so just today I'll eat whatever I want..." Bullshit. "I'm driving on a road trip, so it's easier to eat a burger in the car or a bag of chips..." Bullshit. (Becky actually fed me yogurt while I was driving. We must have looked ridiculous, and had a good laugh) "I'm visiting grandma. I have to eat whatever she puts out or she'll be offended..." Bullshit. And man, you do not want to offend dear Florence Meltzer by not eating her food she puts out, the "nosh'odai" as we call it. (Probably wrecked the Yiddish spelling.) Gotta hand it to the "little hurricane" as my aunt calls her. The woman is 87 years old battling cancer, had just had a chemo treatment that morning and still managed to put out a spread. Grandma did start to get offended until I reminded her that I'm training for a marathon and trying really hard to watch what I eat. The scene then played out thusly:
Grandma: No, no. That good that you're doing that. So...how much weight have you lost?
Sandy: Well, about 11 pounds in 3 weeks.
Grandma: Oh, that's good. (pause) You can't see it but...
Sandy: Um, well, uh, ya know it takes time for it to--
Grandma: (indicating my wife standing nearby) Now, her though..Becky, you really have lost
so much weight. You can really see it!
Becky: (trying to be gracious about the compliment while giving me my props) Well, thanks
Grandma. It's been about 4 years and a lot of work. But anyway, Sandy's doing it. He's
gonna get there...
Grandma: I know, but you can't see it on him, but you can really see it on you!
And so on. Woman, if you thought there was any chance I was gonna partake of your nosh, you blew it! No, in all seriousness, Grandma tells it like it is, right? Becky read something the other day that said something like it takes 4 weeks for you to feel a difference in your body; 8 weeks for you to see a difference; and 12 weeks for everyone else to see a difference. I just passed the 4 week mark and I have to say that I do feel a difference. I feel lighter, taller. I feel a little smoother. My pants are starting to not fit right (annoying but satisfying!) The other day my dear friend Stephanie told me she did think she could see it in my face. We had a good chuckle about that and about when people say that. Steph has fought an ongoing battle with her weight as well and followed up the compliment with "WTF? Right? Like that's the part we are most concerned with? Really? Why does it work from the top down? It should work from the bottom up!" I started to laugh as I imagined how different conversations would go.
Grandma: So...how much weight have you lost?
Sandy: About 11 pounds.
Grandma: That's good. You can't see it though. You're ass looks the same.
Sandy: Um...well....(awkward silence)
Grandma: But Becky...her ass looks great! Becky, you can really see how much weight you've
lost in your ass!
Results. We are a goal and results oriented society. We check the scale. We check the stopwatch. "I need to see the numbers drop. The weight go down. The time go down. The speed go faster..." I was bordering on feeling pissed, defeated on Sunday. I lay in bed and for the first time in weeks, I didn't want to go run. I had that momentary "WTF am I doing, do I really want to do this?" I couldn't see the big victories. And I wasn't appreciating the small gains. My daughter Maggie came into the bedroom, sat down on the bed and said "come on Daddy, let's go to the rec center." I looked at her. 11 years old, trying to motivate her old man. I thought about my grandmother who even though she's battling cancer, gets up every morning and puts on a nice outfit and some make-up. Who jumped off of the couch multiple times to get her grandkids and great-grandkids a drink; a napkin; a fork. "Jesus," I thought to myself. "If she can keep moving, keep doing things, then I sure as hell can." I know her example was part of what helped me go out and run in Ann Arbor.
And so, it is a potent reminder that we need to be sure we see the forest and not just the trees. Life is about small details and big pictures. In the film Any Given Sunday, there's a great speech delivered by coach Tony D'Amato played by Al Pacino. (A segment of it is making the rounds in a commercial for Jeep...) There are some quotable ideas and lines but the essence is the following lines which I think are applicable on this journey:
"We're in hell right now gentlemen. Believe me. And we can stay here, get the shit kicked out of us, or we can fight our way back into the light. We can climb outta hell one inch at a time... You find out life's this game of inches...The inches we need are everywhere around us. They're in every break of the game, every minute, every second...We claw with our fingernails for that inch. Because we know when add up all those inches, that's gonna make the fucking difference between winning and losing! Between living and dying!"
Down .8 lbs is still down. Getting up on vacation to run even though it was slow and hard, is still getting up. Small gains, big victories. Inches. Seconds. It all adds up. And it keeps me going.
So, why run a marathon?
So grandma can see it in my ass ;-)
All roads lead to Chicago!
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